Sometimes our harshest critics are staring back at us when we look in the mirror; others are the ones we call our friends, or perhaps family. Too often, we are raised with the assumption that our family only wants the best for us, even if their words are less than pleasant. The problem, you see, is vulnerability. There’s beauty in the way we are blunt with our family and friends, and there’s pain that we mask, never to be shone. Maybe it’s fear, because the thought of rejection is, quite possibly, the worst thing we could imagine. It’s more than rejection in relationships or bonding with family, it’s the idea of putting yourself “out there” that seems scary. Vulnerability is real; even the strongest people will sometimes fall victim.
A friend of mine once told me my biggest flaw, and to be honest, I was more in shock that he was able to pinpoint what exactly seemed to lack in my life more so than I could. He wrote:
“ … Your biggest flaw is not using your full potential that you have,
Because you are so strong that the weak minded will target you and make you feel like you’re beneath them … the weak hearted will use you for their benefit, and the emotionally weak will blame you for their problems.”
Initially, I couldn’t fully process everything he said. Yes, I understood, but on a deeper level, it made me realize that I have spent my entire life trying to please others – not because I needed their love and acceptance, but because without, I felt as if I was nothing. What bothered me the most was that I knew he was right, but I couldn’t force myself to admit that I have spent so many years trying to please others, while I let my dreams slowly fade away.
However, taking an emotional (and sometimes physical) vacation from the ones you love is more than alright. Yes, family is important, but all too often, we forget to take time for ourselves and meditate … be at peace. By no means are you obligated to stay around those who abuse you, mentally and physically. In our minds, we create excuses … cop outs as to why our family/friends decide to treat us any type of way. A lot of people mistake insults and verbal abuse with, “I’m saying this out of love;” no matter what the circumstance, love yourself enough to stop, think about you, and walk away. You were not put on this Earth to be tortured and beaten down; so if there’s anything you take away, remember to hold your head high and adjust your crown. You deserve better in life, because you know better. Speak nothing but positivity, despite the negative tension holding you back in life.
At one point in time, we’ve all done this. Instead of sticking up for ourselves, we shrug things off and pretend like they don’t matter. People, please learn to be a little selfish and put yourself first. Your mental health and stability will thank you later. Protect your energy. There are so many people in this world who love and care for us, but so many more who are waiting to see us fall. I have to admit that I’ve struggled with this for the majority of my life, but then again, I’m human, and I’m learning. So to my friend, I thank you so much for caring enough to speak truth in life. Your words, ever so beautiful, mean more to me than you shall ever know.